April 1, 2024 – You’re a traveler who demands excellence in your destinations, your experiences, and especially your coffee. But until now, the perfect pour-over on the go required lugging half your kitchen through security.
Enter the xBloom Globetrotter Set, you will get: One Studio Pro Max machine + a sleek, TSA-approved suitcase engineered exclusively for your Studio Pro Max machine, because airport coffee is a crime against humanity.
✨ The Ultimate Travel Setup for Coffee Snobs
Custom-cut foam interior cradles your xBloom like the precious cargo it is.
Built-in scale & gooseneck kettle compartment – because pacing your pour matters, even at 30,000 feet.
"Barista’s Secret" imaginary pocket for your favorite beans (fits up to 2kg of smugness).
Auto-voltage adjustment – Brews flawlessly from Tokyo to Marrakech without frying your circuits (or your patience).
Time Zone Roast Sync – Adjusts extraction time based on how many hours behind sleep you are.
Aroma Wake-Up Alarm – Wakes you with the smell of fresh pour-over. Way better than hotel wake-up calls.
🎤 Testimonials From the Frontlines of Caffeinated Travel
"Used to get ‘randomly selected’ every time I flew with my AeroPress. Now I just get admiring nods from fellow coffee nerds." – @NoCompromiseNomad
"The xBloom suitcase fits in overhead bins better than my will to live after a red-eye." – @BusinessClassBurnout
"Finally found my soulmate—a piece of luggage that understands my commitment to avoiding Starbucks at all costs." – @ThirdWavePackLight
💸 Pricing (Because Excellence Has a Price Tag)
$1,299 (includes suitcase, xBloom Pro Max, and a "I Travel With My Own Water" sticker)
"The Minimalist": $349 (just the suitcase – for people who think they can stop at one coffee gadget)
🚨 Disclaimer
Does not guarantee that your checked luggage won’t get lost.
May cause extreme jealousy among fellow travelers (not our problem).
P.S. First 100 "orders" get a "This Machine Pays for Itself in Hotel Coffee Savings" calculator.
Because if you’re going to fantasize about travel gear, it might as well be caffeinated ☕✈️
Get notified when the "Globetrotter Set" releases.
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